The next section in the goals worksheet I found online has the heading, “Obstacles.” It asks eleven questions. Over the next several days, I’ll answer them one at a time in the blog.

“Am I willing for life to be different?”

This is one of those questions that I’ll answer impulsively and then, upon further reflection, find a  deeper wisdom in the question and an opportunity for a more searching introspection. To the question “Am I wiling for life to be different?” I answered an immediate and emphatic, “Yes!” This is especially true if I think about where I was on September 1st last year when I started this year of intensive trying (or letting) my life to improve. Things are already much better because of the “work” I’ve done since that time to include the blog and how embarrassingly honest I’ve been with you, how I’ve let my un-spiritual, un-evolved, non-looking-good self show, and especially how un-perfect I’ve let the whole process be. This is very unlike me. Those of you who know me well know how true this is. Moving back to New York has also been a huge boost to my mood across the board. I find that when I’m in New York, I am generally 50% happier and 50% more hopeful— just by being safe inside the city walls.

So to the question “Am I willing for life to be different” and forcing myself to consider my answer more carefully before I offer it— yes, I am willing. I am willing to see my dreams come true, I am willing to accept divine guidance as to what steps I need to take to see them come to fruition, I’m willing to alter and adjust my dreams— to let them evolve as I move forward and (hopefully) grow spiritually, and I’m willing to try different tactics if the ones I’m using aren’t working and I’m willing to have whatever force removed the obsession to drink from me all those years ago, also remove any character defects or faulting thought processes that might be standing in the way of my bringing these goals and dreams into manifestation. Yes, I’m willing. And I’m willing to admit that I may have blind spots where my willingness is concerned.

If I had been fully willing for the changes in my life that need to happen to happen— and I do mean fully willing— it occurs to me that perhaps my goals would already be made manifest. Does that make since? It’s no mystery to me what I need to do for each of my goals to come true. When I ask my “Divine Higher Self” or “God” or “The Universe” or whatever what exactly the action items under each goal need to be, the answer comes immediately. So if I was completely “willing for life to be different” it sort of goes without saying that I’d be willing to do each of those action items under each of those goals. So clearly, I’m not completely willing to do them and therefore not completely willing for life to be different. So what do I do with that?

Two answers come to mind: pray and seek support from my fellow travelers.

Through this goals worksheet, I expect I’ll be revising my goals once again (maybe not) and that will come pretty soon. In the meantime, I’ll let them stand as they are. The list is about twenty items long and there are no action items under each of the goals. Can you believe that?! I’m over 170 days into this process and I still haven’t delineated what exactly I’m supposed to be doing to move closer to seeing these dreams come true. That, perhaps, should be the next step.

So here’s what I commit to you: By the time I write to you tomorrow night, I will have put at least one action item under each one of the goals. Deal? And tonight, to get me moving forward with even greater momentum, I pray this prayer:

Infinite Creator, Source Supreme, I am now willing that you remove every single thing that stands in the way of my being able to allow these goals to come into perfect manifestation in my life. Please show me anything else I need to know and I pray that others may be helped by this process as well as me. Please grant me increased willingness where I might be lacking. These things or something better I ask for in deep faith and trust, and so it is. 

Feel free to pray it with me, for me, and/or for yourself. If you me to pray specifically for you, private message me or post some indication of that desire in the link to this blog on my Facebook page. As always, thanks for taking the journey with me.

See y’all tomorrow.

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